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The Defenestration of Blog

My blog has killed fewer people than Ted Kennedy's car.


congratulations are in order

Jason Giambi hitting a dinger
The newly steroid-free Jason Giambi hit 2 home runs today, numbers 299 and 300 of his career. This is especially significant since I picked him up in the 8th round of my fantasy draft this year.

where will we find a solution for piratical acts on the high seas?

The free market, that's where.


in this post we add captions to pictures from the NY Federal Reserve's Web site

Alright boys, I can now certify that this chocolate is 100% kosher.


Jimi Hendrix facts

Maxim published these tidbits from the new biography, Room Full of Mirrors

Here is what I learned:

Jimi served in the 101st Airborne

Despite needing glasses, he was a crack marksman

Jimi was initially pro-war

He got out of the war by telling the doctor that he was a gay

His dad had 6 fingers (on both hands)

Jimi was the first black person that Sting ever saw

Jimi gave $10k to an NYC organization that mailed weed to random people in the phonebook

His first gig was at Temple De Hirsch Sinai

memorable search terms used to find my blog

"law school" + "no jobs" (Yahoo)

Robert Byrd Statue (Yahoo)

niggaz rockville (Yahoo)

pigfucking (Google)

Thanks to BlogPatrol for their wonderful free service!


equal opportunity bashing

Since I just bashed a Democrat for his cockamamie legal theories, I figured I might as well lash out at a Republican as well. Our good friend Rick Santorum penned this degenerate rant for National Review [thanks to AC for the link]. What troubles me even more than his negation of our civil liberties is his bombast. He could have expressed every idea in that article with two words: heil Hitler!


and how is this illegal????

Sony BMG Music Entertainment, one of the world's largest record companies, agreed today to stop providing lavish gifts, free trips and other giveaways in exchange for airtime for its artists on radio stations, under the terms of a settlement with the New York attorney general's office.
Eliot Spitzer, the New York State Attorney General, announces an agreement to halt
The settlement, which includes a $10 million payment to a fund for music education, is the first in a broad investigation by Eliot Spitzer, the New York attorney general, into incentives that record companies offer to radio stations in hopes of getting airtime that will raise their artists' profiles, increase a song's ranking and, of course, drive up sales.
"This agreement is a model for breaking the pervasive influence of bribes in the industry," Mr. Spitzer said in a statement. "Contrary to listener expectations that songs are selected for airplay based on artistic merit and popularity, air time is often determined by undisclosed payoffs to radio stations and their employees."
And this is a crime because?????????????
Is it really news that radio stations play crap? Who cares why they do it? I'll tell you who: an opportunistic prosecutor who wants to run for governor.
This is strictly an internal personnel matter for the radio stations. If the DJs are engaging in practices that would cause a decline in quality and market share, the station managers can fire them. When did it become the government's job to make sure that the entertainment industry is a meritocracy?

Hey Spitzy boy, I have a complaint: the only male redheads in Hollywood are only there for comic relief. I think it's clear that the brown and blond-haired actors in this country have formed some sort of cartel that bribes the casting people not to give work to redheads. Well I refuse to be another Conan O'Brien, Ron Howard, or Woody Allen. I demand an Oscar-worthy role. Besides, who gives two shits about the law if it means one more vote?


all of a sudden, mutually assured destruction is this month's hot button?

Representative Tom Tancredo (R-CO) has been taking a lot of heat for his off-the-cuff interview remark that the appropriate response to a nuclear terror attack may be to nuke the holy sites of Islam:
Tancredo: Well, what if you said something like, "If this happens in the United States and we determine that it is the result of extremist, fundamentalist Muslims." You could take out their holy sites.

Campbell: You're talking about bombing Mecca?

Tancredo: Yeah. What if you said, "We recognize this is the ultimate threat to the United States, so this is the ultimate response." I'm just throwing out some ideas because you would be talking about taking the most draconian measures you could possibly imagine. Because other than that, all you could do is, once again, tighten up internally.

Granted, these remarks will certainly make it harder to "win minds" in the war on terror. I'm sure his comments have already been twisted against us throughout the Muslim world. Unfortunately, al-Qaeda is probably nuclear by now, or it will be soon enough, and this is an issue that has to be addressed regardless.

During the Cold War, we avoided an all out nuclear holocaust because the retaliation from a nuclear attack would result in unacceptable damage to both the US and USSR. That is, the Russians knew that nuking DC would mean that we'd certainly return the favor to Moscow. As far as I know, people didn't raise hackles about us wielding the threat of a radioactive Red Square. They knew that it made sense.

So if threatening to blow up a mosque in Mecca is the only way to stop Al Qaeda terrorists from nuking our holy shrine (the New York Stock Exchange), then that shall be our policy. And it's only worth a damn if we credibly make it known to them.

Detractors would point out that targeting our retaliation on an Islamic holy site would be seen as a collective punishment, turning all of the world's Muslims against us. While that's true, it misses the point entirely. This isn't about revenge or jingoism. It's simply a matter of deterrence. The appropriate retaliation to threaten would be whatever is enough to deter the terrorists from nuking our cities. I don't know what it would take to deter AQ from nuking us, but I think every option should be explored. Plus it certainly doesn't hurt that the terrorists see our public discourse on retaliation now includes the possiblity of turning Mecca into the Ronald Reagan Memorial Parking Lot.


"reformed" racist senator speaks

Unabashed pigfucker Robert Byrd (D-WV) writes that "One's life is probably in no greater danger in the jungles of deepest Africa than in the jungles of America's large cities."


why do i hate government?

Because I read about things like this:
When I visited Richard Paey here, it quickly became clear that he posed no menace to society in his new home, a high-security Florida state prison near Tampa, where he was serving a 25-year sentence. The fences, topped with razor wire, were more than enough to keep him from escaping because Mr. Paey relies on a wheelchair to get around.
Mr. Paey, who is 46, suffers from multiple sclerosis and chronic pain from an automobile accident two decades ago. It damaged his spinal cord and left him with sharp pains in his legs that got worse after a botched operation. One night he woke up convinced that the room was on fire.

...As he took more pills, Mr. Paey came under surveillance by police officers who had been monitoring the prescriptions. Although they found no evidence that he'd sold any of the drugs, they raided his home and arrested him.

Thanks to Raging Pundits for the link.
This article is an in-your-face example of how government often does far more harm than good.

If you're a human being with any common sense, then you too are disgusted by this type of thing. After all, Paey wasn't bothering anyone. In fact, no illicit drug user is bothering anyone by merely taking drugs. For those of you who still think we need a drug war, just remember that it requires a bigger, more powerful government, complete with counterproductive agencies like the DEA. The DEA, like any bureaucracy, will always try to increase its budget and jurisdiction. And so it goes, as Thomas Jefferson said, "The natural progress of things is for liberty to yield and government to gain ground."

As Paey's tragic story demonstrates, the law of unintended consequences lives on. Unfortunately, Jefferson does not.

the relationship of gun laws and crime

Raging Pundits just posted some original research


it's ok because I'm Jewish part III

Today I was chatting with a friend who is in the market for a new Volkswagon Jetta:

Friend: for another g they tack on a diesel engine
Abu Gingy: diesel gas costs less right?
Friend: yeah
Abu Gingy: don't they make a car that runs on Zyklon B?

sexual innuendo of the week

Front desk lady: Abu Gingy, you have a big package.
Abu Gingy: Why thank you. Do you like big packages?
Front desk lady: Why would I? They usually just leave me hurt.
Abu Gingy laughs like Beavis

just desserts?

Gene Healy writes from Scotland:
Quite by accident (visiting the city museum) we stumbled upon Adam Smith's grave at the church across the street. Appropriately, there was a crumpled McDonald's wrapper on top of it.

The Defenestration of Blog is willing to wager a Happy Meal that the whole burger was there until Paul "Hamburgler" Krugman caught a whiff of it.


puppy love

I was on P street between 14th and 15th, a known bulldog hangout when I saw a crowd gathering around a dog. I decided it was best not to leave anything to chance so I crossed the street to see for myself. Sure enough, it was a bulldog pup, 8 months old, so it was almost fully grown but still lean. It clearly had a good pedigree and it was especially energetic by bulldog standards. I crouched down to pet it and it jumped up and gave me a kiss on the lips. True, I had no idea where her face had been beforehand, but it still made me extremely happy.
The dog looked something like this pic I just found:


are the rich getting richer?

Ragingpundits shows data that suggests this is merely an illusion. The rich seem to earn a higher percentage of national income when the number of immigrants is high, depressing the denominator of the equation.

To my loyal readers: my blogging is going to taper off a bit for a week while I study for my final. Hang in there, cause I'll be back with a vengeance.


you know which word is underrated?


who is worse: a tax and spend liberal or backward-thinking conservative?

Most libertarians would probably say the tax and spend liberal is worse. I'm still not sure which is worse, but I definitely know who gives me the more visceral reaction, and it's conservatives by a mile.


Economic leftists are usually aware of the unintended consequences of their redistributionist policies. They know that the cost of their cushy social safety net is slower growth, lower productivity etc. It is a tradeoff that they are consciously making, and it's respectable. See, I bash Paul Krugman and his ilk, but for all my talk of the "retardian school," these people are still intelligent; I just passionately differ with them on the ideal role (and scope) of government. The major exception to this is protectionism, which is at best the economic side of isolationism and worst an expression of populism.

Social conservatism, on the other hand is unforgiveable. I'm talking about the type of social conservatism that preys on peoples' fears of immigrants and gays, advocates for school prayer and teaching creationism, thinks that society needs even more prisons (especially for non-violent offenders), and introduces flag-burning amendments. Staunch social conservatives are clearly brain damaged. That's why you'll see my worst venom reserved for people like Rick Santorum and Heshy the Homophobe (who is probably just flamebait).

Come to think of, what if Rick Santorum is also flamebait? Perhaps he is just a robot being controlled by a pimply 14 year old kid in South Korea. His meteoric rise to power will culminate in his presidential inauguration, when he will stun the world by pulling off his mask to reveal a computer screen flashing the word "pwn3d!"

Pwn3d indeed. What a totally 1337 pr4nk.

rick santorum: america's greatest embarassment

Left: Unbelievable bastard Rick Santorum (R-PA)

Rick Santorum blamed the Boston Catholic church child molestation scandal on the city's loose morals. As far as I am concerned, this sounds like a critique of the priests more than anyone. After all, they should be leading the people, not following them.
Read his drivel first hand.
The Defenestration of Blog would like to present an open letter to Rick Santorum:
Dear Senator Santorum,
You suck. You are beyond degenerate. You are subhuman. And that's putting it mildly. You are lower than a puddle of monkey spunk underneath a pile of elephant shit in the middle of Staten Island.
Why don't you blame the church and its institution of celibacy for its priests' behavior? Don't you think there just might be a little connection?
I hate your jerk-off name, I hate your jerk-off face, and I hate YOU, jerk-off.
Sincerely hoping you get raped by a priest,
Abu Gingy

[With Santorum and unabashed pigfucker Robert Byrd out of the way, the subject of my next congressional bashing will be Rep James Sensenbrenner (R-WI), whose Stalinist policies make me want to revive the HUAC and use it against him]


baseball research continued

Thanks to Dave of baseballgraphs.com for directing me to the page on STATS with the right data. I compiled the following based on the average numbers for an entire team in the 2 leagues for the first half of the 2005 season:

It seems that an AL player is about 11% more likely to homer at a daytime at-bat, while his NL counterpart is about 8.5% more likely to knock one out during the day.

So far my hypothesis isn't looking too shabby. Now to adjust for noise and see how significant these results might be.


do baseball players hit more home runs in day games?

It's common knowledge that mens' testosterone levels peak in the morning and decline throughout the day. For that reason, weight lifters are advised to lift in the morning, if possible. I have personally confirmed that I have significantly more power lifting first thing in the morning compared to lifitng after work. [Update: see the article I posted in the comments. It says that the muscle performance peak for something like swinging a bat is actually in the late afternoon/early evening. If we take this as meaning 3:00-8:00 PM, then it might not matter, since both day and night games are framed by about an hour of this window. Also, when an east coast team goes to California for a 1:00 PM game, the east coast player's circadian rythyms would be on a 4:00 schedule, making the timing perfect. A west coast team playing a 7:00 game in New York would also be on a 4:00 schedule as far as their hormones are concerned.]

So here's my hypothesis: home runs/at bats should be higher for day games than night games. This could be interesting research, but I can't do it at this point because:
1)I don't know where to find aggregate data on day and night games
2)I'm sure there are other day-night variables (light, temperature, pollen counts, wind, etc)) that might create a lot of noise, so I would need to brainstorm with some scientifically savvy people.
3)To what extent does the pitchers' higher testosterone matter? I suppose fastball pitchers might be more effective, since they improve with more power. In fact, that could be a whole other paper: comparing different types of pitchers at day and night. Obviously, the hypothesis would be that fastball pitchers have a comparative advantage (and thus should be used for daytime starts).
4)Is this even worthwhile? For all I know, the change in testosterone might not be as significant as they make it out to be in Mens Health. Again, I need help from some science people.

I don't know how much research has been done on day vs night games. I think it might be worth doing a lit review on this and maybe publishing something.

Will any potential collaborators please come forward? Even if you dont want to work on this but have a quick word of advice, your suggestions are welcome. (Post a comment, trackback, or send an e-mail to .

Look one post above this, or just click here

as if we needed any more proof that minimum wage laws are moronic

ACORN, a group that agitates for high mimimum wages, has petitioned a court in California to exempt itself from the state's minimum wage laws!
What's more, ACORN made the exact same arguments its opponents make when arguing aginst higher minimum wages -- namely, that paying higher wages would mean the company would have to make do with fewer employees.

In a suit ACORN filed to exempt itself from California's minimum wage laws, the organization wrote in its brief:

"As acknowledged both by the trial court and California, the more that ACORN must pay each individual outreach worker--either because of minimum wage or overtime requirements--the fewer outreach workers it will be able to hire."
Straight from the U.S. Chamber of Commerce talking points! ACORN also has a history of union-busting, ducking overtime requirements, cutting late paychecks, and general anti-labor practices. In 2003, the National Labor Relations Board made the following findings about the organization:
• ACORN pays its field members $18,000 per year.
• Field members typically work 54+ hours per week.
• Field members are rarely given weekends off.
• Field members are expected to canvas neighborhoods alone, sometimes at night.
• ACORN is frequently tardy with member paychecks.

Read the rest at Spurlock Watch

abu gingy's socratic dialogue with a BBC exec

BBC edits out the word terrorist
By Tom Leonard
(Filed: 12/07/2005)

The BBC has re-edited some of its coverage of the London Underground and bus bombings to avoid labelling the perpetrators as "terrorists", it was disclosed yesterday.

Early reporting of the attacks on the BBC's website spoke of terrorists but the same coverage was changed to describe the attackers simply as "bombers".

The BBC's guidelines state that its credibility is undermined by the "careless use of words which carry emotional or value judgments".

Consequently, "the word 'terrorist' itself can be a barrier rather than an aid to understanding" and its use should be "avoided", the guidelines say.

Full story

Disgraceful. Using a hypothetical Socratic dialogue with a BBC policymaker, I will now show you why this sort of postmodern sophistry is dishonest:

Abu Gingy: What is a chef?
BBC: Easy. A chef is a person who works in a restaurant kitchen for his living.
Abu Gingy: Great. What is a banker?
BBC: Well, a banker underwrites loans for a living.
Abu Gingy: So what do they have in common?
BBC: They both work to earn a living.
Abu Gingy: So if we were to call them the chef and the banker, respectively, we would be reffering to what they do. Right?
BBC: Spot on.
Abu Gingy: And if we wanted to categorize them more generally based on their purpose of their actions, what would we call them?
BBC: I reckon we'd call them workers.
Abu Gingy: So reffering to our friends as workers is just as legitimate as reffering to them as the chef and the banker, is it not?
BBC: I suppose so.
Abu Gingy: Very well. How can you apply this to your editorial policy?
BBC: Hmm...well, some people don't consider earning a living as the end of their actions. Instead, the end of their actions is to instill terror in people.
Abu Gingy: Carry on.
BBC: Whether somebody tries to foster a massive state of terror as a bomber, sniper, or kamikaze pilot, he is nonetheless a terrorist.
Abu Gingy: *slow clap*


stats at their best

In 1973, based on anecdotal evidence that carpet contributed to allergic reactions, the Swedish government banned the used of carpet in all public facilities.  Carpet was replaced with hard surface flooring materials in homes, commercial environments, government buildings, and carpet market share fell from approximately 20% of the market share to less than 2% of the total flooring market share. Follow-up studies by the Swedish found that the replacement of carpet with hard flooring materials actually cause allergy complaints to increase. The swdish Government ban on carpet in publice places was lifted in 1990 based on the reasoning that hard surfaces caused allergic complaints.Central Statistics Bureau indicated a dramatic increase in reported allergies by the Swedish population following carpet replacement. As carpet was removed and hard surface flooring was installed, the incidence of allergy increased among the Swedish population. This alarming increase was in direct proportion to the amount of hard flooring materials installed. This ban was removed after 17 years when the dramatic increase in allergic reactions was confirmed.

orthodox judaism only sustains itself by missing the forest for the trees

Jewish Atheist quotes Noam Chomsky (something which I normally disapprove of) to explain how Orthodox Judaism avoids debate on the finer points of theology:
The smart way to keep people passive and obedient is to strictly limit the spectrum of acceptable opinion, but allow very lively debate within that spectrum - even encourage the more critical and dissident views. That gives people the sense that there's free thinking going on, while all the time the presuppositions of the system are being reinforced by the limits put on the range of the debate.

--The Common Good, Noam Chomsky.

Read the post, if only because it's something that I have been saying for quite some time. It goes a long way towards explaining how so many people, some of whom I can personally attest are brilliant, free-thinking individuals, to believe in something so nonsensical. It also expresses one of the principle frustrations I had with my traditional Jewish upbringing. I always hated sitting in synagogue and listening to the rabbi go on some long discourse on an esoteric aspect of Jewish law. A typical sermon might pose a question such as "On a fast day, if one has been fasting with the intention of breaking his fast later on during the fast day, is he permitted to recite the blessing on the Torah, as long as he has not yet broken the fast?" Then he goes through the various opinions and legal reasoning for 20 minutes. While this may fascinate the type of guy who enjoys hairsplitting and dead horse-beating for its own sake, it only irritated me. Wouldn't that 20 minutes have been better spent on a stirring oratory about morality or the nature of God? On a better day, the rabbi would try to palliate the more morally inclined types with some cutesy homiletics, none of which ever satsified me.
For many years, it was only an irritation, but once I became an atheist I understood that the only way the rabbinate sustains Orthodox Judaism is by defining the boundaries of inquiry to end at legalistic debates on ritual observance.
Orthodox Judaism has a remarkable level of internal consistency on matters of rituals and Jewish law in general. However, once I began probing on a deeper level, (reading Bible criticism, theology, philosophy etc) revealing the tenuous foundations of it all, the house of cards came tumbling down.

Addendum: This isn't to say that if not for all the focus on finer points of ritual observance, nobody would believe in Judaism. Far from it. All varieties of all religions have some level of attrition to atheism. All I'm saying is that the obsession with hairsplitting over ritual keeps the Orthodox attrition rate artificially low. While people from other denominations and religions are grappling with the issue of God from an early age, the product of a traditional Jewish education will have skirted such issues entirely. One can easily spend his entire life marveling over the great edifice of Jewish law without ever having asked the tough questions on life.

great op-ed on Kelo

Written by another former Cato intern:

update on Heshy the Homophobe

Remember my original post on the retard of the week? I joked that since he believes gays must deserve AIDS, he probably also believes that the tsunami was a punishment that South Asia deserved. I am humbled/chagrined/horrified to learn that he actually thinks this way:

I'm now approximately 75% sure that this guy is flamebait.


so THATS where my student service fees went!

I was reading The Onion and saw this advertisement for American Apparel. Apparently my alma mater is furninshing the prizes for wet t-shirt contests. When the next McGill almuni magazine arrives, I'll make sure to give it a good home.

we need more businessmen like this

...at Weldbend we believe that the way to combat foreign competition is to invest in the most modern equipment, the most efficient production methods, and the most dedicated people in the world – and to treat the customer fairly. We have done all of these things, and that is why we can compete in the market. We do not need government help.

– James J. Coulas, Sr.
President, Weldbend Corporation
March 9, 1994 response to ITC summons (U.S. I.T.C., 1995)

Does this all sound pretty obvious? It should, but corporations are in fact the biggest welfare queens out there. When they can't compete with another country's industry, they often call a meeting and discuss several strategies:
1)We can make a better product that people actually want
2)We can control costs
3)We can go to the government, which can create tariffs and non-tarrif barriers to trade.

Unfortunately, option #3 is often the most profitable route. It means simply retaining the services of a few influential lobbyists. You lose out, because you have to pay a higher price for whatever it is you're buying. This is welfare in its purest form. It is a transfer of wealth from you to somebody else, and all you get in return is a slap in the face.

These practices aren't limited to international trade. Many, if not most, of new business regulations are only in place to protect the largest firms in the industry. Regulatory compliance is expensive, and it frequently serves as a barrier to entry to block new competitors from entering their market.

I was originally going to just post the quote that I found, but I felt like going on a rant. Why? Well, just the other day I was hanging out with a bunch of people and one of them reduced libertarian thought to "let's let corporations control everything!" Libertarians are frequently faced with such ignorant broadsides. The distinction people miss is that libertarians are pro-free enterprise, not pro-corporate. Free enterprise policies are usually good for most corporations and consumers. However, in international trade and regulatory matters, free enterprise policies often clash with corporate interests.


i was just thinking of this simpsons quote for some reason

In Simpsons 3F13, "Lisa the Iconoclast," Lisa and Homer are summoned to appear before the town jubilation committe. Mayor Quimby and the rest of the committee are upset that Lisa is trying to reveal local historical hero Jebediah Springfield's piratical past. The following is an example of the type of writing that you just don't see on TV anymore.
Quimby: You are tampering with forces you cannot understand. We have major corporations sponsoring this event.
Lisa turns around to face a suit in the back
Lisa: I hope you know you're sponsoring a celebration of a murderous pirate.
Man in suit: A pirate? Well, that's hardly the image we want for Long John Silver's!

Rehnquist's inevitable retirement

Everyone know's that Rehnquist is going to retire. The guy can barely wipe his own ass by now. Yet he supposedly postponed his planned friday announcement due to it being overshadowed by news of the London terror. Gimme a break.

That's A Lawsuit hit the nail on the head with this entry.


markets in everything

Handmade Bulldog Wall Clock with Swinging Tongue

Can somebody lend me $250?


the london terror attack

Image hosted by Photobucket.com

Ken Livingstone, mayor of London, condemned the attack as “mass murder” as he prepared to leave Singapore to return to the capital.

“I want to say one thing: This was not a terrorist attack against the mighty or the powerful, it is not aimed at presidents or prime ministers, it was aimed at ordinary working-class Londoners,’’ Mr Livingstone said.

I think this underscores an important point: while they are politically and religiously motivated, we must also remember terrorists are essentially bloodthirsty savages more than anything else.

Just as with 9/11, they could still have executed a highly symbolic attack if they had struck at midnight. Nonetheless, they preferred to strike at rush hour so as to murder as many people as possible. If anything the infrastructure damage was merely collateral. Any explanation of the causes of such terrorism that omits bloodthirst is intellectually bankrupt, plain and simple.


circumcision found to reduce spread of HIV

Circumsion was found to reduce the chances of contracting HIV by 70%. This is great considering that some vaccines are coming out which reduce chances by 30%. Together, they will make it 100% impossible to get HIV! (Just kidding, but wouldn't it be funny if probability worked that way?)


more on the retard of the week

It seems that half the recent posts to DovBear have to do with Heshy the Homophobe(see below, post titled "mental retard of the week"). I only stumbled upon him from his comments on a post at The Kvetcher. Apparently he is notorious among the many readers of DovBear.

paul krugman: the retardian view on obesity

Paul Krugman's attitude on obesity, as expressed in his NYT article, is a perfect example of why we have so much obesity to begin with. His view isn't fringe by any means; 64% of Americans also believe that obese people are not to blame for their weight. While I don't deny that there is a genetic component to metabolism, the fact is that you are still responsible for your diet, lifestyle, and therefore, your weight. Some people just have to work a little harder than others.

On this July 4th, the Defenestration of Blog would like to remind readers of one of the paramount principles of our great republic: individual responisibility. More government is not the answer to your problems. To put it bluntly, put down that Snickers and get on the treadmill, fatty.

Further reading on nanny state issues: Radley Balko

Now if you'll excuse me, I think I hear a gym calling my name.

the shit i get on friendster

What's the deal with all the Filipinos on Friendster?  I have gotten messages from several random ones over the years, but this guy's message was by far the most disturbing:
Image hosted by Photobucket.com

Jesus Christ, learn some fucking English. And if you're going to hit on other guys, you might be better off focusing on the gay ones.

More potential Kelo fallout or: How i learned to stop worrying and use the Kelo decision to get a bulldog on the cheap

I was studying math on a bench in Dupont Circle when a bulldog with an adorable overbite waddled by. Obviously I struck up conversation with the owner and found out that they were actually visiting from New York City.

After telling the story to a friend, she told me I really need to get a dog already. I gave the usual spiel about the time and expense involved (NB: purebred bullies go for $2000). Suddenly, inspiration struck: I can get the dog for next to nothing. Here is my plan, step by step:
1)Network with the D.C. Democratic party to get connections to City Hall
2)Lobby the City, explaining how Abu Gingy's ownership of the bulldog will keep it in DC, requiring him to buy dog food at the local Safeway, thus increasing local tax revenue
3)The city exercises its power of eminent domain, as was recently defined in Kelo v. New London, handing over custody of the dog to Abu Gingy in exchange for a "fair" price

The next out of town bulldog I see may not waddle out of my life so easily...


blog housekeeping

Haloscan commenting and trackback have been added to this blog. Unfortunately, all of your old comments were deleted. Oh well. I guess you'll just have to make up for it with a flurry of new comments.

greatest blog of all time?

This blog is in the tradition of Real Ultimate Power; it's just a guy who is obsessed with something and writes about it like a 10-year-old. Unlike Robert Hamburger, Horse Hater hates the object of his obsession: horses. His unbridled anger makes for some side-splitting laughter.

If this guy comes out with a book, I'll buy it just as fast as I bought Real Ultimate Power: The Official Ninja book.

mental retard of the week

If he's consistent, the other side of his sign will read "God sent Tay-Sachs disease to punish ultra-Orthodox Jews." And of course, he must be wearing his T-shirt that proclaims "God sent the tsunami to punish South Asians for being so darn brown!"

Check out the blog of the pigfucker who posted this. Talk about an idiot...this guy has fewer chromosomes than an apple tree. I'm hoping that he steps on an AIDS-infected syringe next time he goes to the beach.


2 months, still in awe of skateboarding bulldog

Image hosted by Photobucket.com

Tyson the Skateboarding Bulldog

arbitrage opportunity

The controversial postage stamps that Mexico recently issued are selling for a lot of money on Ebay. If you live near the border, you might as well drive down and buy some, assuming they aren't sold out. Worst comes to worst, everyone else will have caught on and you'll just be able to sell them for par value to some Mexican.
The stamps were being offered on eBay at prices topping $200 for a full sheet. Hundreds of people lined up at Mexico City's main post office to buy them for 6.50 pesos — about 60 U.S. cents — when they went on sale Friday.
Full Story

If you don't live near the border, perhaps this is your chance to finally take a trip to Cancun. It'll pay for itself!

Political risk factor: perhaps the reason for all the hording is the possiblity that the pressure from U.S. black leaders will cause them to cut the print run short, making the stamp a rarity. Assuming that Jesse Jackson doesn't prevail, time is not your side as these things will only become cheaper.

this post shall not be construed as an incitement to illegal activities

In Washington, in front of the main Johns Hopkins SAIS building on Massachusetts Avenue, there is a full section of the Berlin Wall on display outdoors. In theory, one could grafitto-tag something onto it. The best part is, you will be perpetrating a historic fraud, as people will think that "Phatty Cornrow$" was written by some Berliner in 1989.